My life file: Lately – The not so pretty

Hello and happy Monday!! I really wanted to publish this post last Friday, but my brain was simply fried, and even though I had a post for all of you, it just didn’t reflect my current state of mind so I didn’t publish anything because I couldn’t get around to finish this one. Anyway, just as I often show you the pretty side of my life (like last week’s post), the last 9 days have been so so crazy, that I wanted to show you the not so pretty side of it. Last week was pretty hectic, as I impulsively decided it was time to potty toilet train Matthew while we were facing some big changes, especially for him and me.

Since we came back from The Island, I’ve been trying to get Matthew into daycare/kinder/preschool whatever you want to call it. But it hasn’t been easy, at all. Basically, to sum it up a little bit, if you don’t get on a waitlist while pregnant, there’s a very small chance your child will get into daycare/kinder/preschool (how crazy!). And, because we lived in The Island since Matthew was 9 months and we weren’t sure when exactly we were going to be back in Toronto, I just never cared to get him on a list (foolish of me). Well, I’m going to spare you all the loooong and boring details, but in order to get to my point I just have to tell you that it’s been it was quite an odyssey. Just when I thought that we had found the perfect place that met our
expectations and requirements, I found out that he wouldn’t be accepted in that place because he was never been to daycare before. So basically, my son, who is not even 3 years old, has already been rejected from “school”, how insane? My husband thought it was hilarious and laughed about it, but of course, my reaction was quite different. I felt angry, sad and so frustrated! I cried. And I even questioned my role as a mother. I thought “what are we doing wrong?” “what did we do (or not do) that he won’t get into preschool?” You know what I mean?

Anyway, things happen for a reason, and last week Matthew started preschool in a place I LOVE. It’s been hard work on getting him to adapt, but surprisingly, he’s been doing really good! Considering that 2/3 of his life were spent in The Island and by my side all.the.time, he’s adapting pretty well. I honestly expected the worst, but I think my little guy inherited my adaptation skills 😉

Now, at the same time, and you’re going to call me crazy, I decided to potty toilet train him. Yeap, I went down that road. Why did I do it at the same time? well, besides the obvious timing (he will be 3 next month), I thought that his charm and sweetness (he really is a sweet little guy, wink wink) were not enough to balance out his wild side (remember we lived in The Island? we call him the wild one). I just didn’t want him to be a teacher’s worst nightmare (never been to daycare, not potty trained, doesn’t nap, highly energetic, you see what I mean?) So, between toilet training and a very different new routine, the last 8 days have been tough! On Friday, I was exhausted, both mentally and physically. As I said, my brain was fried, deep fried.

So why am I sharing this boring stuff with you? well, I thought I should tell you that not everything around here is pretty. I’ve spent a couple of days cleaning peed clothes, peed rugs, and making trips to the toilet so often that after realizing how much time I was in there, I just brought mi iPad with me and sat on the floor. But, I believe there’s a lesson in every situation in your life, and I think I learned some stuff from these past 9 days, and part of it I owe it to my friend Lauren (read this post) because in the middle of this crazy week I enjoyed the journey and I made sure I did when I was loosing my patience, loosing my faith in Matthew and stressing about this new and very different chapter in his life. We had lots of accidents, but you know what? we laughed. And instead of telling myself “time goes by, so in 3 days this will be over”, I just told myself “enjoy the ride and live this moment because this is part of the journey, this is the journey”.

Have you ever felt like you wanted to get over something very quickly because you knew it
wouldn’t be fun or pretty? How did you deal with it? Next time you feel like you just want to get over something, I suggest you step back and enjoy the process. Even if it’s not pretty at all, it is part of your life, and that’s what matters. There’s no way you can fast forward some chapters of your life, the good and the pretty are part of it just as the bad and the ugly are, and it is up to you to decide how you handle them. It is up to you to believe that things will resolve eventually, and I like to believe that most of the times, they do for your own benefit. Maybe that job that you wanted so bad didn’t quite work for you, well I’m sure that there was a reason behind it. I think we have to be patient, and understand that it is all part of our journey, I think we have to focus on not loosing our positiveness. Take me as an example, after 5 months or so, everything finally seems to be working out fine, so have faith 😉

* To give you some context, you should know that Matthew has been by
my side since he was born, no nannies, no day cares, isolated in an
Island where there was nothing since he was 9 months old, and to top it
off, since we came back to civilization, he stopped having naps. Don’t get me wrong, I ADORE my son, and as I’m thrilled to be getting time for myself, I’m already missing his company!

* Don’t know what The Island is? Read this, this and this post 😉

Toilet training must-haves!

As you can see, he’s been doing good! (he gets 1 sticker for every successful toilet trip)

Ready for preschool 🙂